Riding the Wrong Train

I knew during the break-up process that it would be good to be single for a while.
I needed some time to try and figure out who Single Me was and if she was different to Relationship Me.

Turns out that Single Me is a train wreck.
Relationship Me was definitely heading down a better path.

Single Me hasn’t cooked one single decent meal in three weeks.
There may have been the odd piece of fruit, but in general, she will sit on the couch hungry rather than actually cook something.
She has no idea what’s in the fridge or the cupboard.
On the rare occasion she does bother her arse to cook something, it will usually involve frozen chips and gravy.
Relationship Me barely knew what a freezer was.
Clothes haven’t been washed, bins haven’t been emptied, the bathroom floor must be checked for underwear before visitors use the facilities.

But the worst thing facing Single Me is The Dishes.
I have always hated doing dishes.
Always.
When Relationship Me was living with Him, we had a deal -I did all the cooking and He did the dishes.
Now Single Me is forced to deal with them…and is fighting every step of the way.

Things got so bad last week that I had to keep the kitchen door closed because the dirty plates and cups were starting to smell. The next day, and less than an hour before I was to receive a gentleman caller, I stood in front of the washing machine for a good five minutes contemplating whether or not there were moral or ethical (or dignity) issues in hiding all the dirty crockery in the machine for the duration of his stay .

In the end, I made a compromise with myself -I just kept him out of the kitchen.

Relationship Me was an actual grown up.
She understood the importance of health insurance and savings and eating healthily.
Single Me just doesn’t seem to give a crap.
I feel I’m regressing back to the middle of my college years and wonder how long it will be before I show up drunk for work.

There’s an internal struggle where I pine for what I was, but love the freedom of where I am.
I’m being ridiculous and irresponsible and the weight of Life has been partially lifted from my shoulders.
Yes, it might seem that at 24 I should be moving forward instead of backwards, but feck it, I spent my early twenties trying to the A Grown-Up and look at where that got me!
Grey hairs and stress-related IBS.

So for now, I think I”ll enjoy the craziness and worry about tomorrow tomorrow (or maybe in a few months time).
And until then, I’ll take a trip to Tesco and stock up on paper plates and cups….

16 Comments

Filed under Daily Update.

16 responses to “Riding the Wrong Train

  1. SJ

    You’re 24 .. plenty of time for washing dishes! Although the underwear on the bathroom floor is a little worrying, maybe keep that one in check ;) You’re doing great!

  2. Disposable kitchenware FTW. Boyfriend made me do dishes over the weekend and I was pretty raging at him for even suggesting it – that’s how much I hate dishes

  3. you’re only 24, you should be having the time of your life! I’m 26 and am just about to start living my life! :) Just enjoy yourself. Oh and I hate doing the dishes. Just get a dishwasher. Then you don’t have to worry! :D

  4. Ah, just order in pizza for all your meals. Then you can just throw the boxes away… or build them into some sort of fort :)

  5. That’s what dishwashers are for… ;-)

  6. paper plates are the future. x

  7. Hang in there Hermia, I think you’re doing brilliantly. Everyone hates doing dishes. I love the dishwasher so much I’d never move into a house without one now!

  8. So in your opinion what is a grown up? Future post perhaps… :)

  9. It took me 2months to get my own routine going, don’t worry, not that it will take you that long now. I got broken up with mid semester 1st assignment deadline week, the same week as my brothers anniversary, what would have been his 21st, got let go from my job, laptop crashed (didn’t have money to to fix). 2 essays were irretrievable and group project not kept up with so (rightly so) got threatening email from lecturer about failing the class. Sure it was lovely. AH no but I hope I will handle a crises upheaval better next time, be more resilient. I am doing an accessible psychology night course at the moment. Moodwatchers, its about rational thinking and the science of health and happiness. Google it. Lots of research has gone into why people fall apart and don’t deal with crises well and fall into that hole. Whats not examined is how some people though scarred bounce back, each week we tried different mood booster. what I remember are excercise, doing hobbies u love/ distraction/ or flow in life as our tutor calls it, last I remember was laughter. ah doorbell. Anyway be good to yourself.

  10. Oh YES! Hermz, come be a non-grown up for a little while with me!
    We’ll have fun and never worry about anything except where the next party’s at!
    Xxxx

  11. Oh my, I actually chuckled at this manically. We posted dishes related woes the very same week. I hear you – I HATE washing dishes!

  12. I go through phases of being super organised and efficient and then relapse into being a slob. Right now my apartment is probably the most untidy it’s been since last summer. . you’re not alone. I have every intention of sorting it out once and for all some day soon though – I need a change!

  13. It’s sometimes a little scary to realise you never knew this completely different other person in the form of Single Me. It’s like discovering a shocking secret about someone you thought you knew all along.

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