A little letter to …Vanessa Hudgens

Dearest Vanessa,

I was browsing through Perez there and just saw a clip from the Teen Choice Awards where Dane Cook hit you with a total low blow!

Just in case you’ve forgotten what happened, I’ll remind me you:

Dane started off saying that he needed to mention something that everyone was thinking but wouldn’t say, and then he goes “Where’s Vanessa Hudgens!!? Vanessa!?”. The Camera cuts to you and you’re so totally excited that somebody’s talking about you and you start waving about and wooooing.

And then he says ….

“Guuuuuirl, you gots to keep your clothes on! Phones are for phone calls, girl,”

Everyone just started laughing! Even your friend who was sitting with you!? How despicable!

And then there’s this moment where you look way deep and way smart because you can actually just see the light click on in your head as you realise what he’s doing. And then you flashed him this way effective stony face!

I couldn’t believe it! I mean you’re a Disney star, so like it’s SO totally the rule that no one ever talks about anything sexual in relation to you! Just like the way nobody said anything about Miley wearing hotpants and writhing against a stripper pole during her performance!

The first time your nudey photos were leaked, I felt so bad for you because you were only 16 and were kinda new to the fame and the media-stalkage. Also you had a way pretty boyfriend you were trying to impress!

And this time, like so many people are calling you stupid and attention-seeking for taking more photos and letting them get into someone else’s hands! I just think they are so unfair and totally mean people, cos it’s totally believable that you’d think that because it happened to you once, then you were safe from it happening again.

Stay strong guuuuuurl!

Freedom of Photography!!

Hugs and Kisses,


PS: I totally don’t find it suspicious that it all happened at the time your new movie is hitting cinemas….it’s total coincidence!!!!!



Filed under A little letter to...

4 responses to “A little letter to …Vanessa Hudgens

  1. This fact this breast-fed-on-helium kid exists upsets my happiness. She always looks so goddamn smug!

  2. Wait a second, wait a second… It happened AGAIN?! Idiot.

  3. Ahaha love it!!
    Yes.. she really needs to keep her clothes on!!!

  4. She should be a better sport. I know it can happen to anyone careless but I’m a bit sad because she is half-Filipina (I am full LOL). Oh well.

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