Epiphany in the Water Bottle

Foreword: Does anyone know where all the bloggers have disappeared to?….Thursday’s usually aren’t this quiet…

Guys, I’m wise.

Like REALLY wise.

And deep.

Like the deep end of a swimming pool.

Well, an empty swimming pool.

Cos I can’t swim.

Not that I’M empty….

Gah! Moving on!

So yesterday I bought a bottle of water.

I brought it back to the office and after a few bites of my Sub, I turned to it for salt-destroying support.

*twist twist* with my left hand.

*twist twist* with the right.


Stupid water bottle making me look like a sissy.

*twist twist* with my sleeve wrapped around the lid for extra grip.

Still nothing.

I put it to one side before the two guys in the office started noticing.

I’ll be damned if I ask anyone but The Boy to open something for me, and even that’s rare.

He’s a gloater.

And he’s got a really smug smile.

Not the issue.

After a few minutes of watching the bottle taunt me, I decided to try again.

The lid didn’t budge an inch.


I hate losing and there was no way I about to let a BOTTLE get the better of me.

So I jabbed my fingernail under the lid and tried to break each tiny plastic spoke that was sealing the bottle shut.

One by one.

A minute later the lid was off and I was basking in the refreshment of the best water I’d ever tasted.

Slight exaggeration…

And it was then that I realised that while I’m all for a nice bit of violence,  barrelling in with brute force doesn’t always work.

And when it doesn’t, there’s going to be another more subtle way to achieve what you want, even if it takes a little longer and a bit of patience.

In conclusion, manipulation is the key to happiness and there’s nowt better than a good nagging (verbal or physical) to get your way!

Also I’m a frickin’ genius!

It might even be my superpower…




Filed under Daily Update., General Observations

8 responses to “Epiphany in the Water Bottle

  1. From now on you shall be known as Yoda

  2. emilycross


    “Manipulation is the key to Happiness”

    :), Me likes that!

  3. hahaha true!!

    I am here, but I am waiting to go home and write a proper post- not affected by the work atmosphere!

  4. Eve

    Hahhaha I think I would have given up! Nice.

  5. Gah! This happened me on the train once… not ideal! My hand was cut and covered in bottle-cap shapped dents by the time I finally managed to get it open… So now I have to get my roomies to open my water before I get on the train in case I die of thirst… Oh dear. I hate being weak!!! lol

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