This is the next installment in our anonymous Secret Stories series.
Just a note to anyone who has submitted a piece, I have a backlog right now, and because I’m only featuring two a week, it may take a few weeks for some of your pieces to be featured, so don’t think I’m not using them or have forgotten about them!
To submit your own Secret Story, click HERE
I’ve always been a private person, I’ve never really told any of my friends, even close ones about guys I fancied. I figured crushes and infatuation with guys never last long and there isn’t much use of letting others know of it.
I was 10 years old when I first met M. He was in my class and I slowly started to be infatuated with him. He had boyish good looks and a carefree demeanor, and it helped that he was exceptionally good in art.(Something I was also very interested in.) I was thrilled with every interaction I had with him and this continued on for the next few years until I finished primary school.
I’ve always wondered how he was after that. Where was he studying? How did he look like currently? Did he feel the same way about me as I did about him? I hoped I could just meet him once more, and hopefully he would have grown uglier over time or have some terrible characteristic, just so I could get over whatever I felt for him. I think he gradually morphed into some sort of a Perfect Guy in my mind. In actual fact, I think I hardly knew him at all.
My wish was fulfilled while I was studying to be a designer. I was walking in a corridor at my school one day when I saw him walking past me. I thought that it was just a figment of my imagination until I spotted him again another day. My felt my heart skip a beat the moment I spotted him. He was still as good looking as when he was younger. In fact, he seemed to be the type of guy that I would like.
If you were expecting a story of how a girl finally got together with a long time crush, you are sadly mistaken. I never did have the courage to talk to him again. I have no idea what he was studying at my school or what he is doing now. At times when I’m bored, I would try to Google his name (Yes, I do have his full name memorized). All that had come up was a tiny photo of him in secondary school and a feeling that I’m getting a tad bit stalkerish.
I wonder when I would forget about M. I wonder whether I feel this way because I am still naive about love. I feel this infatuation has long overstayed its welcome. I wonder whether I will see him again.