Let me tell you about the time I….discovered I was a girl

I know you’re probably expecting a childhood story where I happened to see some boy’s pee-pee while he was running around in the nip, being pursued by a heavily blushing mother, and realised that I was missing something.

But this is a much more recent story.

As recent as Sunday.

Yup, at 23-years-2-months-and-10-days I finally realised I was a girl.
I’ve always been a little slow to grasp things.
“What do you mean there’s no toothfairy!!!!!????”
“Hermia, you’re 19…”

*sigh*

It was during that damned Scare Walk in Madame Tussauds.
I thought it was just wax figures of movie monsters and villains!!!!
As I naively strolled up to the door with The Boy, I saw the signs saying it wasn’t suitable for Under-12s and people with heart complaints.
Eh what?
The figures can’t be THAT scary, right?

And then I heard the screams from inside the section.

Feck that!!!
I’m out of here!!!

As I tried to explain to The Boy that he’d have to drag me in there kicking and screaming, well, he dragged me in there kicking and screaming.

And I didn’t stop screaming as we entered the darkness and crazy people started jumping out at me and shouting and blowing on my hair and looking like something from an asylum!

I cowered behind The Boy, holding his top in a vice grip and refusing to look around me (that’s when that fecker started blowing on my hair and face and saying in a London accent “She dawhsn’t loiiiiike i'”).
Bastard.

I was close to tears, I’d freaked myself out that much!!!!!!!
Scarlet much?

“I can’t believe you dragged me in there!!!!!” I shrieked at The Boy when I finally got out of the pit.
He looked bemused. “I’m a little shocked.”
“Why!?” I demanded. “I told you I didn’t want to go in and you dragged me!”
“Yeah, but I thought you were messing,” he said. “I thought you were tough.”
And then he hugged his whimpering-eejit-mess of a girlfriend.

That struck a chord with me.
He was right.
I used to be tough!!!
What happened to me!?
I’ve been a tomboy for as long as I can remember!
I spent my childhood watching horror movies and beating boys up!
I refused to wear dresses and skirts until a few years ago!
Up until my teens, I had the knees worn out of my jeans from fooling around in the outdoors!
Lol I should rephrase that.
*cough*
Basically, from general childhood horseplay and fun and games, all my jeans were ruined.
I had no time for dolls or playing Mammy.
A couple of years ago, I had no time for feelings or emotions or tears.
I didn’t like human contact very much.
I was known as the “Ice Queen” who had a “Heart of Stone” and dammit, I took pride in that!

And now…..
I love shopping.
And clothes.
And puppies.
And being in a couple.
I never watch horror films.
I enjoy sewing.
And hugging.
And doing things with my hair.
And shoes.
And pink.

My name is Hermia.
I get scared easily and like fashion shows.
I am a girl.
*sigh*

Now please enjoy this picture of an adorable kitten…

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15 Comments

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15 responses to “Let me tell you about the time I….discovered I was a girl

  1. OMG KITTEN! *coos*

    Ahahahahaha! It all happens to use eventually m’dear.

    In your defense, Madame Tussauds Chamber of Horrors is a frightening, frightening place if only because I found out that there were actual original death masks in there

  2. I had a similar revelation, if a little earlier in life than you.

    I was terribly tomboyish for most of my life. All my friends were boys and our activities were either football, or something you needed to build a ‘base’ for. But then one day… I hugged my friend Brian before I went home (I don’t quite know why? A subconscious urge? I was 14), and he blushed WILDLY and stared into space, frozen as if someone had just killed his pet.

    ALL the other lads were feigning vomiting and making faces at me. Overnight I decided I must be a girl. I wore mascara to school the next day and washed my hair mid-week for the first time EVER (yukky now, regular back then). The transformation happened quickly.

    And now, like you, I’m a fully fledged, pink-loving, skirt-wearing wimpy little woman. 😛

    • Lol that was a really quick change!!!! Mine seems to have been very slowly happening over the last three or so years….like a glacier….you don’t notice it’s doing anything and then one day you’re like “HEY! How did you get so close to me!?” or kinda like coastal erosion….you visit a beach for years and years and then one day you suddenly notice it’s smaller and you say “HEY” Where did half the beach go!?”

      They were the only things I can remember about Geography, lol!

      Oh and rocks….I remember the rocks….

  3. Eimear

    Hahaha you amuse me to no end! Great post.

  4. Embrace your ovaries!!!!!

    Well. You know what I mean.

    *awkward*

  5. I loved this! I had an amusing/slightly embarrassing time once when I finally, after around 5 years, realised that my friend Jack, was my friend Jack… It’s difficult to explain and it’s the source of “hilarious jokes” amongst friends- but it was a revelation- sort of… not really. But yeah, I love your posts.

    • Lol, do you mean that you suddenly realised that he was of a slightly attractive opposite gender as opposed to one of the guys?

      • No, seriously can’t even explain it. Like I was just sitting there one day- and I realised he was my friend Jack- as oppose to all other Jacks- It was the most weird thing thats ever happened inside my head, and my friends have never been able to let it go. To this day, I honestly don’t know what my thought pattern was hoping to achieve at that time haha

  6. I was always so very girly (at the age of four I picked out a dress I wanted my mother to wear for my first parent/teacher meeting)… I hated being dirty and even though I love horrors I still to this day sleep with the light on! I am slightly addicted to shopping and I’ve over 70 pairs of shoes and I’m always doing stuff with my hair. But I ain’t a huge fan of uneccessary (that ain’t spelt correctly) hugging. Strange don’t you think?!?!

    Anyway I welcome you with open arms into the world of being truly girly (even it you don’t wanna be here).

    Ps: love your blog, very cute (wait, its very tough) hope that makes you feel better he he

    xx
    Rhona

  7. Heh, in fairness though that scary part of Madame Tussauds frightened the bejaysus out of me. I was there with my Mam and kept pushing her in front of me cos I was so scared. I feel I should point out that I’m about 5’9 and watch horror movies whereas she’s about 5’nothing and HATES horror. So I was hiding behind my tiny Mammy. But she was grand while I nearly peed myself. State of it.

  8. Kar

    I was a tomboy for years, to my mother’s despair … to the point that even on Christmas Day there are several years worth of photos of me in boys shorts and tracksuits. My nanna probably nearly cried every time I turned up for Christmas church looking exactly like my brother.

  9. haha too funny! makes me sing that show tune ‘i enjoy being a girl’…
    im with you though – girly all the way, somehow moreso as i get older

  10. I’ve always said joining the military has made me more of a girl. I never wore pink for that, but now I do.

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