Hermia vs Dunnes

I was doing my grocery shopping in Dunnes last Wednesday.
I know…it’s a thrilling life I lead.
Anyway, after I found what I needed, I then queued up for 10mins while the dizzy middle-aged lady took her time scanning in the groceries belonging to the man in front of me.
He had about 15 items.
I thought his head was going to explode.
She had some unbelievably shameful moments during this process, but my personal favourite was when she picked up an onion and said “So…this…is………………… an onion?”
Did she raise her voice at the end of that sentence?
She looked at the man for conformation.
He nodded in disbelief.
She looked pleased with herself.

Eventually she got to me and thankfully didn’t take too long scanning my items in.
“Emmmmm….that’s twenty euro aaaaaaaaaaand…..seven cent,” she told me.
I handed her a fifty-euro note and a ten cent coin.
She looked at the money in her hand for a minute.
Till Lady: Emmmmm….*looks at the screen*…..a fifty and a ten….emmmmm. I don’t know how to put this in.
Hermia: Em, ok?
Till Lady: *looks at me for help*
Hermia: *looks confused*
Till Lady: *turns around to another till girl working behind her* Louise!!?
Louise: *flinches* *ignores her*
Louise: *sighs in resignation* Yes?
Till Lady: I have a fifty and a ten! *waves fifty euro note in the air*

Fudging hell, Woman!
I’m going to be attacked and mugged when I leave here if you keep waving that around!

Louise: *looks confused*
Till Lady: How do I put it in?
Louise: Oh, put it in as 5 0 1 0.
Till Lady: 5….?
Louise and Hermia: *looks of disbelief*
Louise: 5 0 1 0 and then press ‘cash’.
Till Lady: 5…..em….*looks at screen*….5….*looks back at Louise*…5…
Louise: 5 0 1 0 and then press ‘cash’!
Till Lady: …..wait, what do I press?
Hermia: 5 0 1 0 and then press the ‘cash’ button.
Louise: *smiles her thanks*
Till Lady: *looks at me* *looks at till* *looks confused*
Hermia: On the screen, press 5 0 1 0 and then ‘cash’. You don’t need full stops or anything.
Till Lady: *presses 5* 5….
Hermia: 0
Till Lady: 0
Hermia: 1
Till Lady: 1
Hermia: 0
Till Lady: 0
Hermia: Now press the ‘cash’ button.
Till Lady: Cash button…..?
Hermia: The ‘cash’ button.
Till Lady: Cash button. *till pops open* Oh….oh right….and now your change?

Yes that was a question.

The End.


Filed under Daily Update.

30 responses to “Hermia vs Dunnes

  1. hahahaha!! some cashiers can be so ditzy sometimes…! I’ve never experienced that before whenever I’ve been in Dunnes…!!

  2. Yikes, I work the cash register, and if I did what she did, my boss would probably kill me! Though I have trained a girl who was strikingly similiar to the lady you’ve described in your post–cept she smacked on her gum like no tomorrow when she talked to customers, so your till lady’s not so bad in comparison!

  3. oh the poor lady was certainly overstrained with all this new technology….or maybe it was a bad day…. I aways think old ladies are cute 😀

  4. victoria

    Oh my good god! I got aggrivated just reading this, I can’t imagine how irritated you were standing there!

  5. Oh wow… that sounds mentally painful!

    You do seem to have rather a lot of bad luck!!

    Kathryn Xx

  6. still in disbelief… ><"

  7. Wow! That’s a new low for Dunne’s! Fun fun…

  8. Oh dear.
    The boyfriend always reminds me that they have that kind of work because they have that level of intellect. Hence, getting mad would be pointless. Still, it does make your blood boil, doesn’t it?

  9. Jeebus. Fair play to you for having the patience to guide her though it, I’m not sure I’d have been able for that at all!

  10. Holy moly, I can’t work out whether to be amused or appalled!!
    Fair play to you for your patience!

  11. Jesus you’ve the patience of a saint not to fuck her rightly outta it.

  12. Amy

    Wow, I probably would have asked her to call the manager. The bit about her being proud about identifying an onion is priceless. Still laughing.

  13. Zoe

    oh my god. do people not get trained on tills anymore?? how was she working there? HOW? you know to avoid her queue anymore!!

  14. dear lord I hope it was at least a case of first day nerves!

  15. Heather Steele

    Dunnes are always ridiculous. I was in there with my boyfriend one day and he gave me a kiss on the check, seriously that was it, and a sales assistant came over and told us that it was a ”family store”. *Rolls eyes*

  16. Claire

    I work for Dunnes Head Office, and I’m sooooper embarrassed that you went through that. Sounds like the poor lamb was left on the tills to fend for herself without proper training. I have to say though, I thought Dunnes minimum requirement was to at least know what an onion looks like.

  17. How did she get the job??

  18. Aimee

    I literally lol’d second sentence into this and then continued throughout. So Funny!

  19. Hahahahaha!!!! Ah jaysus God love her!!!

  20. Good grief – I would not have had the patience…

    That being said, it’s definitely not indicative of people who work tills – My best friend works the till in Dunnes and is one of the smartest people I know!

    • Oh God I know! She was obviously just a bit overwhelmed with everything! Sure these days, you don’t know if you’re talking to a doctor or solicitor behind a till when you pick up your newspaper!

  21. Amazing. Absolutely amazing!

  22. Too funny! You have made my day!

    Do come and enter my Artful Offering!

    Art by Karena

  23. Ehh.. was she drunk? I got annoyed at her just from reading that, fair play to you for not leaping over the till and getting your own change and legging it..

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